Today as I pulled into the Church parking lot I saw I man hobbling around the sidewalk, homeless and drunk. And then he fell onto the sidewalk. I decided as I found a parking spot I'd see if he was okay. (Now at this point some people may be thinking 'you are a 21 year old female...careful....', well I was thinking about that too, don't worry. But my theory is if I ever get robbed they're gonna be really disappointed- $3 and a 2yr old free tmobile phone won't make them much money...I'd probably be most disappointed about my coupons and chapstick...) Anyway, so I caught up with the man and asked if he was okay. He said he was but he had been drinking so he had been having a hard time. He then vowed to quit drinking all together because it doesn't get him anywhere. I agreed with him and we chatted a bit. I then noticed he wasn't wearing gloves. We continued our conversation which led to God and his faith in Jesus. He explained how he didn't understand atheists but he secretly tries to explain to them why God is so good, he asked God for forgiveness for being sneaky (I laughed). Throughout this conversation I looked him in the eye. He had such beautiful blue eyes and I decided to give him my gloves. Unfortunately they were a Christmas present my sister made me (I haven't broke the news to her that I gave away the gloves she spent hours on...eeeeekkkkkk!)
As he put on his gloves, I held his cane, needless to say I had to help him. He then assured me he'd stop drinking because alcohol does no good. He only got one glove on while I was with him because then he started falling asleep so I told him I hoped for the best for him and began walking up the steps to Mass. He then told me I was an amazing person and told me God Bless countless times. As I stepped into Church, there was Jesus in the Monstrance and it struck me, I just had a conversation with a (probably) homeless drunkard who now has my sister's mittens (they were too large for me anyway...they fit him like a glove! sorry...couldn't help that pun...). But that man is still a man, just as Jesus helped everyone, we should too. So in a small way, I helped Jesus and I realized all this as I was starring at the beautiful Monstrance hold Jesus.
This is why I'm Catholic. I seek to see Jesus in every human being. I get to be with Jesus in the Sacrament of the Eucharist everyday if I want. But why don't I? Why don't I help more people in need? Why am I not more charitable? Why do I not always seek God with my whole heart? Or utilize the amazing Sacraments, especially the Eucharist? Lots to ponder on... but for now, I shall work on seeking God in all things.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Monday, November 21, 2011
The Occupy Movement
I know, I know. ANOTHER opinion about the occupy movement. I just want my voice heard. Well, just pretending someone is listening by blogging will work too.
Occupy Wall Street. What the heck? First off, who are these people? And where did they come from? You can't tell me all these people protesting have been laid off work because of the 1%. And even if they were, have they been seeking employment? I somehow don't think they have been since they started protesting so I don't feel sorry for people who are not proactive about improving their lives... yes, a little harsh but it leads me to my next point... (not to toot my own horn but it's my perspective...)
I am a college senior. I'll be honest, my parents helped me pay for school. I still have student loans I will pay off. I chose to go to a private university knowing I would come out with loans. Due to the scholarship money I received this private school tuition costs less than instate tuition. I have worked at the same place all 4 years tutoring underprivileged kids as my work study job. I will graduate with a B.A. in Psychology, Theology, Nonprofit Leadership, a concentration in Fundraising, and a certification from the Nonprofit Leadership Alliance. Because of all of this I have had to take 18hours nearly every semester. I hold multiple leadership positions on campus. On top of my 18 credit hours I have internships to improve my resume. Needless to say, I work hard and do not spend time getting drunk and partying. I will graduate in May with loans but I will not complain, I will pay them off easily because I live modestly. I have a cell phone that only texts with T9 and spend $30 every 3 weeks at the grocery store. I hope to get a job in my field right after school but if I don't I will be open for any job. I made a decision when I decided to get a degree and that decision was that I would be in debt, but I will work hard so it's not for a long period of time.
Yes, I'm part of the '99%'- if you want to look at it that way. But that is just one statistic...
I am also part of the 1% in the world because I have a computer and will have a college degree. I am part of the 34% of the world with a cell phone. I am part of the 83% who have access to safe drinking water.
And the craziest part of it all? I am part of the 5% from the United States, who have 32% of the entire world's wealth.
As Americans, we are the 5%. And to think, the rest of the world could start protesting against us saying they are the 95%. Put things in perspective, and be a little more grateful this Thanksgiving for what we do have, not what we don't have...
Occupy Wall Street. What the heck? First off, who are these people? And where did they come from? You can't tell me all these people protesting have been laid off work because of the 1%. And even if they were, have they been seeking employment? I somehow don't think they have been since they started protesting so I don't feel sorry for people who are not proactive about improving their lives... yes, a little harsh but it leads me to my next point... (not to toot my own horn but it's my perspective...)
I am a college senior. I'll be honest, my parents helped me pay for school. I still have student loans I will pay off. I chose to go to a private university knowing I would come out with loans. Due to the scholarship money I received this private school tuition costs less than instate tuition. I have worked at the same place all 4 years tutoring underprivileged kids as my work study job. I will graduate with a B.A. in Psychology, Theology, Nonprofit Leadership, a concentration in Fundraising, and a certification from the Nonprofit Leadership Alliance. Because of all of this I have had to take 18hours nearly every semester. I hold multiple leadership positions on campus. On top of my 18 credit hours I have internships to improve my resume. Needless to say, I work hard and do not spend time getting drunk and partying. I will graduate in May with loans but I will not complain, I will pay them off easily because I live modestly. I have a cell phone that only texts with T9 and spend $30 every 3 weeks at the grocery store. I hope to get a job in my field right after school but if I don't I will be open for any job. I made a decision when I decided to get a degree and that decision was that I would be in debt, but I will work hard so it's not for a long period of time.
Yes, I'm part of the '99%'- if you want to look at it that way. But that is just one statistic...
I am also part of the 1% in the world because I have a computer and will have a college degree. I am part of the 34% of the world with a cell phone. I am part of the 83% who have access to safe drinking water.
And the craziest part of it all? I am part of the 5% from the United States, who have 32% of the entire world's wealth.
As Americans, we are the 5%. And to think, the rest of the world could start protesting against us saying they are the 95%. Put things in perspective, and be a little more grateful this Thanksgiving for what we do have, not what we don't have...
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Alright, so I haven't blogged in way too long! I want to get back into this though...but so much has happened, what to write about!?.... I'll just start with what's on my mind! duh...
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I can't even recall how many times I was asked that question in grade school. Teachers, parents, friends- all asking that same question over and over. I remember I had a phase in kindergarten when I wanted to be a veterinarian. I didn't even like animals but that's what my friend wanted to be so I just went with it. Then in about 6th grade I wanted to be a nurse. But that was only for that year. Other than those two grades, I always said the same thing "When I grow up I want to be...successful.".
Alright, so obviously I wasn't creative enough to make something up and write down something cool...
But now...now I'm all 'grown up' and I'm a senior in college looking at the next year wondering why I couldn't have written down something better than 'to be successful'. What does that even mean!? I'll give myself some credit though, 'being successful' is more plausible than being a dolphin trainer or an astronaut (no offense to everyone in my 2nd grade class...)
Now it is time for my great plan of 'being successful' to be put in place since my age indicates I'm grown up (even if I act like a 5 year old at times...). So that leads me to an important question: What is success?
After pondering this easy and yet very complicated question, I realized it means all different things to all different people. It could mean having a million dollar house, with a boat, a BMW and whatever else people with million dollar houses would have. That's certainly not what it means to me. To me, success is being happy. I remember teachers would ask me to expand upon my response of 'being successful'. I'd always tell them I just wanted to be happy. Yupp, still the same answer. Success to me is being happy, living in the moment, loving without holding back, trusting God and believing in yourself. Success is found in love, if you love you will be on the right track to happiness.
Now that's just my opinion. What do you want to do when you grow up? What does success mean to you?
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I can't even recall how many times I was asked that question in grade school. Teachers, parents, friends- all asking that same question over and over. I remember I had a phase in kindergarten when I wanted to be a veterinarian. I didn't even like animals but that's what my friend wanted to be so I just went with it. Then in about 6th grade I wanted to be a nurse. But that was only for that year. Other than those two grades, I always said the same thing "When I grow up I want to be...successful.".
Alright, so obviously I wasn't creative enough to make something up and write down something cool...
But now...now I'm all 'grown up' and I'm a senior in college looking at the next year wondering why I couldn't have written down something better than 'to be successful'. What does that even mean!? I'll give myself some credit though, 'being successful' is more plausible than being a dolphin trainer or an astronaut (no offense to everyone in my 2nd grade class...)
Now it is time for my great plan of 'being successful' to be put in place since my age indicates I'm grown up (even if I act like a 5 year old at times...). So that leads me to an important question: What is success?
After pondering this easy and yet very complicated question, I realized it means all different things to all different people. It could mean having a million dollar house, with a boat, a BMW and whatever else people with million dollar houses would have. That's certainly not what it means to me. To me, success is being happy. I remember teachers would ask me to expand upon my response of 'being successful'. I'd always tell them I just wanted to be happy. Yupp, still the same answer. Success to me is being happy, living in the moment, loving without holding back, trusting God and believing in yourself. Success is found in love, if you love you will be on the right track to happiness.
Now that's just my opinion. What do you want to do when you grow up? What does success mean to you?
Thursday, June 16, 2011
The Annunciation: Mary's Yes
I've been reading this wonderful book called The Reed of God. Dang. If you're looking for a good spiritual read, this is it! Okay, well I've only read 4 chapters thus far...but they are really good chapters!
Well, this wonderful book got me thinking about Our Mother, Mary and most especially the Joyful Mysteries. I plan to have a reflection over all the decades but I'm going to start out with one near and dear to my heart, the Annunciation.
Before I pray the Rosary, sometimes I look up the recommended scripture component to refresh my mind as to what I should be focusing on while I pray. When I did this, it showed me Luke 1:30-33 which begins with the angel asking Mary to not be afraid for "[she] has found favor with God" (Luke 1:30). Gabriel then explains that Mary will conceive and bear a Son, Jesus who will be "great and will be called Son of the Most High and the Lord God will give him the throne of David his father" Luke 1:32-33.
It amazes me that this is all that is included in the Annunciation. Well yes, that seems to sum up the main part but there's so much more to the story! Mary was afraid of the angel Gabriel, sent by God. "It is God himself who, through his angel as intermediary, greets Mary" [CCC 2676, 722]. God, (with the help of His angel as mediator) surprises Mary by his presence. [I must say I would be in shock if an angel appeared to me...if only Mary knew what message the angel was bringing...!] Mary in response, ponders at the greeting (Luke 1:29). Long story short, Mary is unsure if this is truly God coming to her.
The angel explains everything to Mary (Luke 1:31-33) but she then begins asking questions. Yes, Mary, Our Mother, is confused and even unsure of the message from the angel. She questions God as to how His plan will work (Luke 1:34). The angel explains the great mystery of the conception of Jesus (Luke 1:35-37) as the Holy Spirit will come upon Mary and even Elizabeth will be with child.
Mary was overwhelmed, even afraid of God's presence- and that idea surprises us? Of course she was overwhelmed! An angel just appeared to her explaining she was to become pregnant with the Son of God. Talk about a confusing day... How many times are we afraid of God's presence in our own lives? How often do we not want Him to take over our plans? (personally I don't have enough fingers and toes to count...) Mary questions God's plans because they don't make sense to her (understandable...). but how often do we turn away because God's plans don't seem to fit or don't make sense to us?
We are so blessed that Mary's story does not end with all these questions. After these few questions (I would be asking a lot more questions and doubting the whole plan if I were her! ...hence why I'm not...!) Mary says her beautiful yes: "Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word" Luke 1:38. Mary gave herself up, surrendered herself completely to God's will. "Mary, because of her faith, became the mother of believers, through whom all nations of the earth recieve him who is God's own blessing..." (CCC 2676) Mary's yes helps us all grow closwer to her Son. "...we can entrust all our cares and petitions to her: she prays for us as she prayed: 'Let it be to me according to your word' by entrusting ourselves to her prayer, we abandon ourselves to the will of God together with her: 'Thy will be done.'" (CCC 2676)
Well, this wonderful book got me thinking about Our Mother, Mary and most especially the Joyful Mysteries. I plan to have a reflection over all the decades but I'm going to start out with one near and dear to my heart, the Annunciation.
"Mary gave her consent of faith at the Annunciation and maintained it without hesitation at the foot of the Cross" (CCC 2674)
Before I pray the Rosary, sometimes I look up the recommended scripture component to refresh my mind as to what I should be focusing on while I pray. When I did this, it showed me Luke 1:30-33 which begins with the angel asking Mary to not be afraid for "[she] has found favor with God" (Luke 1:30). Gabriel then explains that Mary will conceive and bear a Son, Jesus who will be "great and will be called Son of the Most High and the Lord God will give him the throne of David his father" Luke 1:32-33.
It amazes me that this is all that is included in the Annunciation. Well yes, that seems to sum up the main part but there's so much more to the story! Mary was afraid of the angel Gabriel, sent by God. "It is God himself who, through his angel as intermediary, greets Mary" [CCC 2676, 722]. God, (with the help of His angel as mediator) surprises Mary by his presence. [I must say I would be in shock if an angel appeared to me...if only Mary knew what message the angel was bringing...!] Mary in response, ponders at the greeting (Luke 1:29). Long story short, Mary is unsure if this is truly God coming to her.
The angel explains everything to Mary (Luke 1:31-33) but she then begins asking questions. Yes, Mary, Our Mother, is confused and even unsure of the message from the angel. She questions God as to how His plan will work (Luke 1:34). The angel explains the great mystery of the conception of Jesus (Luke 1:35-37) as the Holy Spirit will come upon Mary and even Elizabeth will be with child.
Mary was overwhelmed, even afraid of God's presence- and that idea surprises us? Of course she was overwhelmed! An angel just appeared to her explaining she was to become pregnant with the Son of God. Talk about a confusing day... How many times are we afraid of God's presence in our own lives? How often do we not want Him to take over our plans? (personally I don't have enough fingers and toes to count...) Mary questions God's plans because they don't make sense to her (understandable...). but how often do we turn away because God's plans don't seem to fit or don't make sense to us?
We are so blessed that Mary's story does not end with all these questions. After these few questions (I would be asking a lot more questions and doubting the whole plan if I were her! ...hence why I'm not...!) Mary says her beautiful yes: "Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word" Luke 1:38. Mary gave herself up, surrendered herself completely to God's will. "Mary, because of her faith, became the mother of believers, through whom all nations of the earth recieve him who is God's own blessing..." (CCC 2676) Mary's yes helps us all grow closwer to her Son. "...we can entrust all our cares and petitions to her: she prays for us as she prayed: 'Let it be to me according to your word' by entrusting ourselves to her prayer, we abandon ourselves to the will of God together with her: 'Thy will be done.'" (CCC 2676)
Friday, April 1, 2011
If God brings you to it...
The other night I jumped into bed at 5 am, nothing completely out of the ordinary for me. Although usually my head hits the pillow and I'm asleep before I can even get to the first Our Father on the Rosary...yeah, that quick! However that night all I could think about was the paper I hadn't finished, the meetings I forgot to schedule, the t-shirts I needed to order, the letters and emails I never wrote...blah blah blah. Next thing I knew I was completely overwhelmed and felt defeated. I felt the need to say a quick random prayer honestly so I could just hurry up and fall asleep. This is how it went:
Dear God,
Why can't you make SOMETHING in my life work out!? I'm busting my butt here, why can't...
Then I stopped.
I just sat dumbfounded. What was I saying? Why was I so angry? Why was I so angry at my God nonetheless!? He's the last person who wants to see us suffer, because He loves us so much. And yet here I was, taking it all out on Him. I know he can take it, but He certianly doesn't deserve it.
Yes, I had just sacrificed my entire weekend, literally canceled everything to work on a paper in which (at that point in time) I was very unsure if I would be able to finish in time. And we all know that if you can't write a paper then you are automatically a failure at life ...because that's logical.
But, I'm sure I'm not the only one who has been in this same position.
Dear God,
Why can't you make SOMETHING in my life work out!? I'm busting my butt here, why can't...
Then I stopped.
I just sat dumbfounded. What was I saying? Why was I so angry? Why was I so angry at my God nonetheless!? He's the last person who wants to see us suffer, because He loves us so much. And yet here I was, taking it all out on Him. I know he can take it, but He certianly doesn't deserve it.
Yes, I had just sacrificed my entire weekend, literally canceled everything to work on a paper in which (at that point in time) I was very unsure if I would be able to finish in time. And we all know that if you can't write a paper then you are automatically a failure at life ...because that's logical.
But, I'm sure I'm not the only one who has been in this same position.
It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out,
As humans, it is so easy to look at a huge task and assume we can't do it. We assume are are not adequate enough for the job and lose all hope and desire to even begin the task, nevertheless complete it. But why do big tasks turn impossible? Perhaps it's all based on the way we view the situation- it's the grain of sand in your shoe. For me, the problem wasn't the paper, but rather my attitude toward the paper (or the grain in my shoe) that was hindering me.it's the grain of sand in your shoe.
Don't pray for a lighter load, pray for a stronger back. -Unknown-The secret is that I'm still struggling. I still get frustrated when I work so hard and nothing happens or when things become too much and I just want to give up. Long story short, I had to pull an all-nighter Monday so I could turn in my paper Tuesday. At about 5am when the deliria was setting in (and I only had 4 hours till class) I realized I was fighting God the entire time. I did not feel I could finish it and I felt worthless-I couldn't accept love. The whole time God was trying to embrace me and show His love for me but I was the kid kicking and screaming, trying to get loose so I could finish the paper on my own.
If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it.
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